Tuesday, June 24, 2008

For the Love of Chaos


For the Love of Chaos
June 24, 2008


The past 48 hours have been chaotic, emotional and draining. Sometimes, what your head knows needs to happen is not always what your heart is set on. Such has been my week.

It is during those sleepless nights, filled with internal conflict and questions, that I turn to some of my happiest and most treasured memories. Since I’m so camera-happy – I have many happy memories captured to be remembered forever.

At around 5ish on my birthday, I was plugging away on my computer, trying to get some work done. My phone rang – it was Renee. She was driving home (or so I thought) and called to see how my day was going. As we’re chatting, she’s asking me some fairly specific questions – like “where are you in your house?” “Are you home?” “Does your den window face the front?” I didn’t think much of it – but she had to get off the phone abruptly to talk to her mom. No sweat. Minutes later, Dani knocks on my office door and asks me to come look at Rosie. I walk out – and standing in my kitchen are Renee, Patrick and Elisa. From there – the sweetest form of chaos ensued.

Elisa, my niece, turned 8 in February. Patrick, my nephew, turned 3 in May. And, of course, Rosie is 18 months. Up until now, Elisa has been the one to play with Rosie. I think Patrick saw her as something he didn’t understand. At the ripe old age of 2, he couldn’t understand that while, yes, Rosie was taking his Doggy from him, she a) didn’t really know what she was doing and b) would not be allowed to keep it and c) didn’t have any understand of mine vs. not mine. Patrick, however, has understood the concept of “mine,” or more importantly, “not yours,” for as long as Rosie has been alive. He’s a smart kid – he gets it.

Well – I got a special birthday gift this year. All three played together. I mean – they really played together. Three little bodies crammed themselves into the 3’ x 1’ space behind the crack house in our family room. The laughter that came out of those three little mouths is still ringing in my ears – nearly two weeks later. Patrick & Rosie – who had never been at odds with each other at all – took their relationship to a new level – a level filled with spontaneous hugs and sharing like they have never done before.

Growing up, the closest kid to my age in my family was my brother – and he was four years my junior. My cousins were all a decade older – or almost a decade younger – than I. I was also the only girl in the bunch. It makes me so happy that my daughter – my children – not only have a wonderful family that they were born into, but an amazing family that we have chosen along the way.

Just one of the many happy memories that keep me warm when the nights seem long and cold.

Sesame Place




Sesame Place
June 13, 2008


About two months ago, Jenn mentioned to me that we should take the kids to Sesame Place. I was immediately on board and thought it would be fantastic to take Rosie and Ben (who are just under 3 months apart in age) to this magical place I remember from my childhood. We agreed that weekends would be too crazy. Jenn’s best day is Thursday – which works fabulously for me, since I have class on Monday and Wednesday. Perfect. Then I mentioned it to Rich.
As most of our friends and family know – summers suck. They are utterly “Comcastic,” complete with nights so late they technically count as early mornings and work so stressful you begin to exhibit physical symptoms – such as twitches – as release. Well – the thought of missing Rosie’s first trip to Sesame Place was too much for Rich, so off we went on Friday the 13th.

I am not normally wary of Friday the 13th – but maybe this time I should have viewed it as an omen and stayed indoors! It was a beautiful day and a nice, easy ride up 95 to Sesame Place. Rosie didn’t fall asleep until we were about 20 minutes away from the park – but she was a happy girl, so the trip was pleasant.

I knew we were in trouble within minutes of arriving. There were loads of seemingly unsupervised children roaming in front of the entrance. It was the dreaded school trip. Ugh. We went in and promptly waited on line for 45 minutes for the tube ride. Well – I waited with the stroller – Rich and Rosie waited on line. While I was waiting, a woman standing next to me had a friend hold a towel and proceeded to strip naked out of her street clothes and put her swimsuit on. I have never in my life seen an adult do something like this in public before. I didn’t know what to do! So I just tried to not notice and not pay attention. Here’s the best part – her friend was holding the towel in front of her – but her backside was COMPLETELY exposed to the line and the exit for the ride directly behind her! Crazy!

We had to leave the park for lunch because the wait for in-park food was over two hours. We went to Cheeburger Cheeburger, had a nice, relaxing lunch and then returned to a much emptier park. We met Oscar, the Count, Bert & Ernie and Cookie Monster – we also saw the 7pm parade.

Rosie had a blast – and I can’t wait to go back with the Kamienskis. It is so much fun to watch one toddler play and laugh in this type of environment – it will be more than double the fun to watch Ben and Rosie play together!

Driven to Distraction

Driven to Distraction
June 12, 2008


It is the wee small hours of the morning – and my mind is working overtime and won’t let me fall asleep. I miss Rosie. She’s only about 30 feet away from me, but sometimes that 30 feet is just too far. I just can’t describe it – it’s an actual tightness in my chest. Why do I have this tightness? Because she was asleep when I got in from class.

Rosie drives me to distraction. It is hard to get anything done throughout my day, because if I am not with her, there is always somewhere I would rather be.

I wish I had finished grad school before she was born. I hate not being here when she goes to bed. I find myself almost wishing that she wakes up in the middle of the night so that I can bring her into bed with us and get hugs and kisses. This journey to a Master’s should be complete in just under two years, but I could cry over the moments that I might miss between 6-9pm two nights each week for the next 104 weeks.

I wish I didn't have to work. I enjoy what I do and get a sense of completion and fulfillment from my work – but I wish I could just spend all day enjoying her.

I wish I realized how precious her baby stages were – even the annoying ones. Last summer, she would only nap if I would lay down with her and let her sleep in my arms. Now – she needs to nap in her crib (soon to be a bed), alone – without me. I love watching her sleep in my arms - and I miss the days of our afternoon naps. At the time, there seemed to be so many things to do. I didn’t see the gift in something as common as a nap.

I turn 29 today. A few people have asked me if I am freaking out or struggling with the idea of being 29. No – not really. Every day I get to pretend I’m a kid and roll around on the floor or tap dance to the closing credits to “Bert & Ernie’s Wordplay.” Rosie definitely keeps me young. On my 30th birthday, I will have two children, two and a half year old and an eight-month old. (Approximately) Now – that freaks me out!

My gift to myself today will be that I focus on spending time with Rosie as much as possible. Yes – I wish I was done with school already. Yes – I wish I could devote all my time to her – especially since this time with just her is dwindling.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Kiss My Butt!


Kiss My Butt!
June 11, 2008


I had class tonight – and on the way home I called Dani – our friend who watches Rosie in the gaps between me leaving the house for school and Rich coming home from work. She asked me if Rosie pooped today. Well – she had – and I have to admit, the question immediately puzzled me. It’s not something Dani normally asks (although I will hear if Rosie poops on her watch).

Well – I guess my little angel went over to Dani and said “I huwt. I huwt.” Dani, who is an excellence surrogate parent in our absence, says to her “Rosie girl, where does it hurt. Want me to kiss it make it better?” And my daughter – my sweet, angelic 18-month old – proceeds to bend over and point to her butt. Yup – she definitely expected someone to kiss her ass!

Earlier today – I did my fair share of butt-kissing. Rosie knocked herself over during play time and caught the corner of her rear end on her crack house. No real tears – but lots of “I huwt” and Mommy kissing the offended area to make it better. So, either she was telling the story to Dani – or she is still feeling the sting of the only edge of her crack house that could possibly even cause a bruise. Regardless – my girl is a character!!

Tuesday, June 10, 2008


Rosie the Rock Star
June 10, 2008


As you probably know – we are pretty big fans of “Rock Band,” the game for PlayStation 3. Rich got it for Christmas from my parents, and we couldn’t wait to start a band. We have three bands going now – The Natty Bohs, featuring Krisi G on vocals and Richie Rich on guitar/drums, The Guest Stars – designed specifically for when we have guests over for the weekend, and The Velvet Lampshades – our most successful band that we started with Joe and Amanda Angelini. I am always on vocals – since no one else wants to take them.

Rosie’s job, while we are all “rockin’ out,” is to be our groupie and play her “jin-jle bewls,” part of the instrument kit that she got from Aunt Jenn, Uncle Wally and Ben last year. Recently, Rosie G has decided to replace Krisi G on vocals – she has apparently had enough of being a groupie and wants the spot light for herself!

The pictures don’t tell the whole story – but Rosie grabs the Rock Bank microphone, unravels it, puts the microphone up to her mouth and starts singing as loud as she possibly can! She sings, she dances – she truly “rocks out.” Check out my little rock star in one of her first videos!

My girl likes the spotlight…I wonder where she got that from?!




18 Months Old and Growing
June 9, 2008

I can’t believe that Rosie is 18 months old. My little baby girl is 18 months old. When strangers ask me how old she is, I can now say “a year and a half.” When did this happen?! She changes so much every day – and I want to just beg her to stay little. At the same time, I look forward to our future – when we can have long conversations and be silly together. Now I get to be silly, and she gets to laugh.

We went to the pediatrician for her 18-month appointment. She is 34.5 inches (97th percentile), 24 pounds 11 ounces (50th percentile), and her head circumference is 48 cm (90th percentile). So she is a tall, skinny thing – not that I didn’t know that already. Some of her 24-month bathing suits (the one-pieces) don’t fit her because her torso is too long, but 24-month bottoms fall right off of her because she has nothing there to keep them up. We should all be so lucky.

She did some tricks for Dr. Terry – showed off her vocabulary…blew kisses….said “thank you” – both in sign language and words. She did a great job of clearly communicating her wants and dislikes. When Dr. Terry was trying to get a glimpse in her ears, Rosie pushed her hand away and said “no! No ear!” I had to hold her head still. One of the more comical parts of the trip was when she climbed on the windowsill. This was made funny only because I was telling Dr. Terry my concerns about her climbing skills and being close to getting out of her crib on her own. As we were talking, she climbed up and then said “hell-yo” and waved. Dr. Terry looked at me and said “it is time for a bed. This week.”

Also during this doctor’s visit was the much-feared MMR shot. I had refused it when Rosie turned 1 – and pushed it back again at 15 months – and now the pressure was on. Truth be told, I have read up on it, and my fears are probably based in general paranoia. I have been afraid of every shot she has needed so far. I remember, just before she was born, I went through a brief period of time thinking I wouldn’t let her get any shots. She was going to be with me – why did she need them? So – I said a lot of prayers. I basically just asked God for a sign. I would let her have this shot unless God told me in some way not to give it to her. No sign came – so I let her have the MMR.

I’m pretty sure I didn’t breathe from the time the nurse entered the room with the needle until five minutes after it was all over. It was all I could do not to cry with Rosie. She looked at me with a red face and tear-filled eyes and said “I huwt. Mommy, I huwt.” No amount of kisses would make this boo-boo better. The nurse explained that this shot stings for a while, so I should expect her to be in some discomfort. I offered Rosie her binkie and her Ernie – which made it all a lot better – and then we got a “Turgle” sticker on the way out – with all 4 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on it. (She picked it – not me.) By the time we were at the sticker station, the tears had stopped.

She told me several times throughout the rest of the day that her leg hurt – and I probably kissed her little thigh 35 times before I left for class at 5:15. More than 24 hours have passed, and Thank God, she has not had a reaction. I can breathe again and relax.

For my first mother’s day, Sue Baker wrote to me that motherhood was to love, laugh, enjoy and worry. She was so right on all counts. I love life so fully. I spend my days laughing and delighting in laughter. I enjoy every minute – even those minutes when Organic Cheez-its are being rubbed in to the carpet. And I worry – I worry more than I ever knew I could worry. I worry about more things than I thought were even possible. I guess it is all just part of being a mom.

Finding Rosie A Big Girl Bed



Finding Rosie A Big Girl Bed
June 8, 2008


After hearing “no kib” one too many times last week and catching Rosie trying to climb out of the crib, Rich and I decided it was time to take our girl shopping for a big girl bed. The timing works out great – because I would love to have her completely transitioned into her big girl room a few months before the baby comes. I don’t want her to feel displaced by the new baby. Unfit Parenting 101 – “the new baby is getting your room – so you have to move in here.” That would piss me off – so I can’t do it to her.

After spending the night at Aunt Tessie’s house and a lovely breakfast in Harrisburg, we drove back to Baltimore and hit Ikea. Rich and I decided that we don’t want to spend a ton of money on her furniture. If you look at his childhood furniture – it is banged up and “decorated” by stickers in some spots. My furniture has water stains from countless glasses and is missing hardware. My childhood furniture is beautiful and I have loved it since I was five – but it was really nice furniture and I really didn’t treat it as well as I should have – and it shows. So – Ikea it is.

Despite the lack of sufficient air conditioning inside of Ikea, Rosie was having a blast. We let her out of the stroller to stretch her legs – and she and Rich found this toddler bed that was very low to the ground. She had such fun with this bed! In the bed, out of the bed. On the bed, off the bed. Under the covers, over the covers. Loved it! She didn’t want to leave the bed.

I’ve been worried about her climbing out of the crib for two months now. She is a climber and a daredevil and will test any limit you give her. There have been some days when she awoke from her nap without making a sound – and the only thing that alerted me to her awake state was a slight rustling sound. That sound was Rosie pushing her Bear, Big Bird and her blanket to the corner of the crib so that she could stand on them and get the extra height. Crazy! So – in another few inches, she will be able to throw that leg over, and I might just hear that dreaded boom in the middle of the night!

Rosie's First Wedding

Rosie with Aunt Tessie's purse - she was enamored with all the "but-tones"

Rosie & Aunt Tessie taking a break from their game of "Chase Me"

Rosie’s First Wedding
June 7, 2008


Well – this wasn’t her first wedding ceremony – but it was the first wedding event that my 18-month-old had the opportunity to attend. We put her in a pretty party dress – and without trying to, managed to coordinate for yet another event. (I wore black, Rosie wore black, white and yellow, Rich wore a yellow shirt) The wedding was for friends of ours – Cheryl and Brad – and it was a wonderful event and a wonderful day, complete with a glowing bride & happy groom.

However – it was 97 degrees on Saturday. I was concerned that Rosie was going to balk at the heat and get cranky quickly, but she held it together for about 4 hours before she was “done” and ready for some air conditioning. We tried to keep her occupied with blocks of cheese, pieces of chicken, lots of “wadee” (water) and some dancing. However, her favorite part of the day was following Aunt Tessie to the bar and playing “Splashy Splashy” in the tubs filled with ice, water and “shodee” (soda).

Of course – Rosie went after everyone’s attention, and was more than happy to put on a show for anyone will to watch. Aside from screaming for “An Te-tsi” and “Mommy” during the ceremony (Daddy took her under the tent to keep her little blond head out of the sun), she was a perfect little angel.

Friday, June 6, 2008

"Baby Zoe" Pictures!


“Baby Zoe" Pictures
June 6, 2008

Well – here they are, the much awaited “Baby Zoe” sonogram pictures. We went for our 20-week ultrasound on Wednesday, and got some pretty good shots – even though “Zoe” didn’t want to pose pretty for the camera!! (I remember a Baby “Ziggy” who did the same thing!)

Why “Zoe?” Well – truth be told, it was the first “Z” name that we came up with – and we wanted to stick with the whole “Ziggy the Zygote” theme that we had before. I just can’t call a baby “it” for 9 months. Since we won’t be finding out the gender with this one either, a name needed to be assigned. Rich came up with it actually – as it turns out, he likes the name Zoe. But – he later confessed that he was using reverse psychology. Ziggy, in his opinion, was not entirely gender neutral, but male – and we had a little girl. So, he thinks that since we are calling this baby Zoe, it will turn out to be a boy!

Me – I think that if we wanted to, this kid could be named Zoe for the rest of HER life! (o:

When Did You Get SO Big?



When Did You Get So Big?
June 6, 2008

So they most amazing thing happened yesterday – my darling, sweet little 18 month old figured out how to get herself into her highchair. No assistance from Mommy needed – She can do it by herself, thank you very much!

Her high chair seat is just over 2” off the ground. There is a little bar at the bottom and a foot rest. The space in between the bar and the footrest is just over 14”. Rosie refused to wear clothes yesterday, so we had an indoor day filled with toys and Shrek 2 on repeat. At some point in between lunch and nap, I stopped playing on the floor to get us both some water. When I turned around, she was in her highchair shouting “bucky” at the top of her lungs. Completely stunned, I walked over to her chair and buckled her in. She then said “no bucky,” so I took off the buckle. This was followed by “hep, down” and the sign for “please.” Hmm…she got herself up there, but couldn’t get down. Interesting.

I, of course, took her out of the highchair and stood her on the floor. It then became a game. After climbing into the chair about five times, I got tired of the game and tried to “hide” the highchair by tucking it under the table. Nope – my girl would have nothing of it! Our highchair is on wheels, and she wheeled it back into the kitchen to resume her game. The only thing that kept her from climbing was the tray – I had to put the tray back in place. After a brief temper tantrum, we went back to playing with blocks and all was well with the world again.

So – my question is this: when did my little baby girl get so big that she could climb into her own highchair? When did she get so strong that she can use her upper body to pull herself onto any piece of furniture? When did she get smart enough to be able to tell me that she got hurt and show me where to kiss? I can’t believe how much she has grown in such a short time. And it scares me a little to think of what she is going to get into next!!

Picture on the left is from Rosie’s first haircut. We went on May 4th to Cartoon Cuts in the mall. Nicole – the girl cutting her hair – came highly recommended by Aunt Renee and cousin Patrick.

Picture on the right is just a random Thursday night. She is sitting on one of our tall barstools in the kitchen. She asked to put up there, and then she asked for her little friends. Well – the bear is bigger than she is!!